Dating, the 1,2,3’s

The other night while having a few drinks and some edibles with the homies we did a little catching up. Seeing how we are all so busy in life its hard to get us all together in one day so we usually start off by asking about each other’s dating lives. The weird thing about this conversation is most of us had no idea where we fell in the dating steps and we even seem to disagree with each others steps and placement. Since I am the “blogger” of the group and love to write (when I’m not suffering from writers block) I felt compelled to write a step by step synopsis of our conversation. As seen on my Instagram story and without further ado, here are our 1,2,3’s of dating, millennial style.

Step 1. Talking

This includes: dm’ing, texting, “hanging out, netflixing (with no chill, unless you’re “hoe-ish” which is ok, no judgment we get it, you have to test the waters), hella online flirting and things like that. By the way, at this point you’ve already liked more than 10 of their pics on instagram which is the international sign for “sup” which is lazy American for, “I like you”.

Step 2.”Getting to Know”/Dating

Here’s where you are actually getting to know this person on a more intimate level. If you haven’t jumped their bones by now, your eagerly anticipating that next moment alone with them. You’re talking on the phone, spending time together, going on dinner dates more often, doing those cute little good morning texts and hows your day texts. Up all night on the phone smiling and talking that “you aint ready, no you aint ready” bullshit. You’ve talked to your friends about them, may have ran his or her name to your crew or just top line hypotheticals as if you aren’t really dating and you are speaking about your friend who is. You may or may not have mentioned this person to your closest friend just to make sure you aren’t dating someone on the “do not date this person list” you and your friends share.

Step 3 “Dating Dating”

Now if you’re a serial romantic like myself than this is the fun part. You both are spending all of your free time together, you see your friends less and less. You both have possibly been spotted out together and you even have intimate relationship talks. You may have possibly introduced this person to one or two of your close friends. You’re still not exclusive per say but you are starting to feel in your heart of hearts that this person is gonna be the one. You have already started to cut off all of the other potentials and making room for someone new in your life sounds like the move. You two are definitely f*cking at this point and leaving clothes and toothbrushes at each other’s apartments.

Step 4 “We Go together”

By now the two of you have cut all your old flings and dates off. You’re f*cking like rabbits. You see your friends less and less but when you do all you think about is getting back to bae. Most of your friends know that this is now a thing and they lost their single friend. You post subliminal posts on your social media hinting that you have someone new in your life but you don’t want to tag them and or reveal them just yet. The both of you speak over 10 times a day and FaceTime each other just to talk about nothing. You both pillow talk about work and friends and laugh about who recently slid into your dm’s.

Step 5 We in Love!

Ok so now the shit is real! A considerable amount of time has passed and you both have gotten used to being with each other. You’ve had those marriage talks low key, you both know you would quickly beat someone’s ass if they disrespected your relationship. The whole world pretty much knows you two are an item. It’s weird for anyone not to see you two together. You both have met each other’s families. You’re probably living together and have mastered the art of arguing and still loving the hell out of each other. Every other picture on your social media is you and bae. You guys definitely have a dog at this point. This is where all the lovey dovey shit goes down and where you see nothing but happiness in your future. This, ladies and gentlemen are the steps to dating. Stay tuned to the steps of breaking up!

 


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