So last week I had the pleasure of being interviewed by two very dope females; Liv Adams and my college mate Amber DW. We briefly touched on my “Napoleon Complex” aka “Short Man syndrome” and it got me to thinking. Why not just break it down from my point of view. Sooooo, here’s my spew on the whole “short man complex.”
Growing up I always thought I was a regular sized dude until the summer of my 5th grade going into my 6th grade year. I realized everyone around me had grew a few inches and I was still the same size from the year prior. It didn’t bother me much, especially with a mom who would constantly reinforce the whole “late puberty thing” every time I mentioned being smaller than everyone in my class. However, the older I got the more it started to bug me. By the time I got to high school I realized I was destined to be a short dude. Two of my younger sisters and a bunch of younger cousins had all either surpassed me in height or were very close to my height and all of my friends with the exception of two were taller than me. By this time, (9th grade) I made sure I kept a short friend around me as often as I could to remind me that there was nothing wrong with my height.
All through high school I would eventually become too familiar with just about every short joke known to man. It became so redundant that I started finishing peoples lines to their corny jokes well before they could finish them underneath all of their lame ass giggling. That actually didn’t bother me to be honest because I had a smart ass mouth. Whenever someone would say, “damn you short” or “can you reach that” I would say something like, “can your mom reach this D!” or “damn you ugly.” I was never scared to speak my mind and I would always end up in arguments and fights because I, yes me, the one being bullied, hurt someone’s feelings. It wasn’t until I became an adult that I realized how much the littlest things would hurt my feelings.
I remember having a girlfriend my senior year who was my height but with heels she was way taller than me. She was half Chinese and half black (name not important, trust me). Her mom was a traditional Chinese woman and would talk about me in Chinese while I was around. Once her mom told her (in my face mind you) that I was too small and I would not be able to protect her. LMAO! It would be a series of unfortunate interactions like these that would lead me to my complex. I remember a time, I had to just be turning 21. I was crossing the street and a guy was backing up and didn’t see me. He almost hit me and he went off on me as if I was a little kid and told me to watch what the hell I was doing crossing the street. Like what! I responded, “Bruh I’m a grown ass man, take your blind ass on and worrying about that fucked-up ass transmission.” I immediately felt like, if I was taller and looked my age he wouldn’t have come at me in that way.
There have been times that people came at me all types of wrong thinking I’m a kid or just some little timid dude and then when I speak up, they change their tone or say things like “my bad bro, wait how old are you again?” You don’t know how often that question gets asked of me (out of nowhere half the time). It’s like it takes for you to speak up and be a dick for people to respect you as a short person at times. I say to myself in many situations, “would they come at you that same way if you were their height?” The answer is always the same to me, NO! Back then I always had a problem, not with my height but with the way people would treat me because of my height. Hypersensitive? Paranoid? possibly, but these days though, I love it! It took some years for me to really own it and accept it. I remind myself that there are people out here that have never had the opportunity to tell a short joke and me being around may be just the comic receive they need to get through their days. Shit I get excited when I meet someone shorter than me. Not that I joke them, I just feel a low key boost of self entitlement when I subconsciously measure myself up to them and realize I won (we short dudes have a contest in our minds instantly when we come across someone near our height and you win, (in your mind) if you are taller than them lol). I say all that to say that I made sure that when I created this blog that I included something about being short as a way of embracing it and letting people know I own it and I can make it look good. The short jokes will always and forever be a thing but when you got brains, looks and blessings from the man above, who gonna check you? lol